It is impossible to make everyone like me……

therefore it would be prudent to start with an assumption of ‘I hate everyone equally’. With this assumption at least it would make my life a lot easier to pick the ones that ‘not hate so much’.

According to my memory I do not recall to hate anyone with a passion (except my father) till now – because I have learnt a way of strategically avoiding such situation by simply ‘cease associating with the ones whom are considered incompatible’. Some may argue that it is technically impossible to do so but I personally have found it very simple – how? Just ignoring one’s very existence. In other words they don’t exist in my life.

I have been hearing this crap too much till now – ‘Keep your friends close and keep your enemies closer’ or ‘It is easy to make an enemy and more difficult make a friend’. Well, obviously everyone has their own interpretation of this abstract noun ‘friend’ as everyone has their one definition in accordance of one’s own convenience / benefit / advantage. In reality ‘friend’ is an associate who keeps a good balance of ‘give & take’. Hang on a second – I do recall old one saying something like the word ‘friend’ always tags the element of ‘unconditional sacrifice’. However, does this element truly and unequivocally have any value in our post-modern world? The answer is obviously ‘no’.

The principle in post-modern world is rather too clear – if you like it, keep it otherwise spit it out. There is no such thing in terms of valuing / cherishing what happened in the past (e.g. good memories). People now tend to only acknowledge one’s wrong doings – they never forget and hence never forgive. Bad memories build an indestructible wall between people which distorts the harmony and peace among people. In conclusion the true meaning of ‘friend’ hence ‘friendship’ is long gone and doesn’t exist any more.

Perhaps I knew that this was coming – after all there is no such thing as ‘friend’ who understands the value of ‘unconditional sacrifice’ and has the courage to exercise when required. People do the right things when it is easy for them to be righteous and when there is a sufficient acknowledgement and reward. In other words ‘sacrifice’ is no longer one way but two ways – there must be an adequate return.

There was the time when I believed ‘utilitarianism’ does exist for good but in fact it cannot exist hence it is invalid to believe in it. There is absolutely no way of keeping everyone happy. Perhaps I knew this too early when I was young. When there is darkness, there is light. When there is happiness, there is unhappiness. Life is all about keeping a good balance – there are people who admire you and respect you, and there are people who hates you and despise you. My conclusion is rather too simplistic here – I neither make everyone like me nor hate me. What do I next? I exercise my own free will to associate with the ones whom I like to associate with at my discretion. What is the minimum criteria for this? A silly question I must say – one who values me and one whom I also value in return – Have we already forgotten about the ultimate reality of ‘friend/friendship’ is nothing but an abstract noun that cannot be defined any more as no one understands the value of ‘sacrifice’ any more and no one has a courage to exercise it? When someone asks me ‘Do you have a friend?’ and my answer is obviously ‘no’. If anyone answers this question is ‘yes’, then I would say that either one is a complete foolish moron or a pretentious idealist who dreams for something doesn’t exist any more.

Going to back where I started – It is neither impossible to make everyone like me nor make everyone hate me. I continue doing what I do – Retaining a good relationship as long as I can possibly can with ones who respect my value and with ones whom I respect their value. I have no one around me who would sacrifice his/her life to save mine and vice versa. This is a brutal reality which everyone does not want to admit but I do. My life is too short and too valuable to worry about the ones who do not like me. In fact it is logically impossible to defend myself against their hatred because they add no value to my life. If there is no value, one doesn’t exist. If not exist, then I simply ignore. My life goes on – no time to waste with something doesn’t exist.

About Brendon Cho

조후혁의 개인 블로그입니다. 1994년 18살때 호주로 부모님과 함께 이민을 왔고 2002년 통계학과를 졸업 한후 통신 회사 Exetel에 2004년 사원으로 입사, 2009년 최고재무관리자 (CFO)로 임명 그리고 2010년 MGSM에서 MBA를 수료 했고 지금 내부 감사장 (Head of Veracity)로 일하고 있습니다. 현재 3명의 자녀를 둔 아빠이고 시드니에서 살고 있으며, 클래식 음악과 글쓰기를 좋아합니다.
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